Peter-pannish.

You know, when we were lying on the picnic mat watching the sky turn from yellow to gold to pink and melt into a dark hue, something gave me great comfort to know that nothing in the world could take that moment away from me, from us. I wanted to lie on grass and you didn't think I was crazy (or maybe you did but that's nothing new to you) and all you wanted to do was to take silly pictures of me because you know deep down inside I'm just a die-hard photowhore.

So there we were, me in my light white-and-turquoise sundress and crazy hair kicking off my sandals lying down on grass and you bringing the mat and food and sharing your life with me and taking random photos with my camera letting the world pass us by. And playing good music on your computer and showing me awesome pictures of your exciting travels. Only you have such a way with words that could bring Croatia to where we were in an instant. I could see the "crystal clear water and gardens dripping and bleeding with flowers", only because you painted it with such twilight beauty.

As the evening melted into the darkness, and we marvelled at how the sky never really turned black because the huge white clouds smothering the skyscape reflected a pink glow over everything, I randomly said that the sky looked Peter-pannish.

Peter-pannish. You knew exactly what I meant and I asked where you'd want to go if you could sail off in a ship-shaped cloud to a never-never land with someone you loved and owned your heart. And you said, "It doesn't matter. "

And I agreed, because why should it matter where we are going if we are in a ship-shaped cloud in a Peter Pan sky going off to heaven with someone we love?

I love the fact I can tell you anything, and we can chide one another in love for all the things we confess about. You're like the only ones who could tell me I don't have a right not to forgive, and make it come out lovingly.

So there we 3 lay and talked and laughed and tickled and I wondered if we could stay like that forever. Talk about our futures and hopes and dreams and the kind of people we would marry and what we would do for one another if we had to plan one another's weddings and funerals.

"Okay," I said, in a theatrical, comical sort of way, "Just in case I die before you 2 do, please cater apple crumble for my funeral. And lots and lots of multicoloured balloons and rainbow-coloured flowers. Don't say I didn't tell you!"

"Apple crumble with ice-cream or not?" you asked.

"With vanilla ice-cream, thank you very much."

Because even though it's morbid to talk about such things, I just like to say them in passing anyway because you just never know what will happen, whether I would die someday travelling, or on the road. Life, is so short. And if I die, I would not want you to think you didn't know what I wanted. For sure, I'd want you to know you mattered enough to me to know about apple crumble and vanilla icecream, ha.

Ah yes, and remember also to take care of my 2nd and 3rd book which are all with my publisher and start a foundation to help people or something. Preferably for underprivileged children and women in developing countries.

So there we were, us 3 on a picnic mat watching the world go by. That was the best moment I've had in months.

And you know what? I wouldn't exchange it for anything in the world, except maybe a ride on a ship-shaped cloud to a Peter-pannish place off to heaven.

*The necklace I'm wearing is made by the widows suffering from AIDS in Uganda, who have children in the same plight. Bought them from this awesome lady who co-founded ROWAN(Rural Orphans and Widows AIDS Network), which aims to move people from helplessness to hope. If you're like me and like funky jewellery, you can get them at Food For Thought (one of my favorite cafes! It's also a social enterprise)in Singapore. If you're overseas, write to them :)